Where is Bob and What the Hell is He Doing Now?

Can You Hide in Your Own Home?

The title is not meant to be rhetorical. These are just a couple of the questions I have been asking myself recently.

Physically, I am residing in eastern North Carolina. Mentally I am living in the world of the books and music that I’m currently enjoying. Emotionally I am drawing closer to my immediate family and spiritually I am trying very hard to listen to the still, small voice inside of me.

Now as to what in the hell I have been doing besides not writing very often on this blog, let me give an explanation of myself.

First of all, what has Bob been eating? I have been dining way too much at fast food places and they are never that good. Some places have better fries then others and some do their burgers better but all in all they are a waste of time and money because they are seldom fast or cheap. At least not like back in my youth when they were first starting to appear nationwide. My life has been hectic and way too many times I have just made quick and easy choices.

Fortunately I have been eating other things and in other places besides these dens of inequity. I have already written about Ralphs and since I live close by now, I have had the pleasure of dining there several times. I also intend to visit and undoubtedly write about several of the other barbeque places that abound in this section of the beautiful state of North Carolina. Word has reached me recently that there are a multitude of barbeques and styles in South Carolina as well. All in good time, all in good time. Other places of local interest where my wife and I have had very good dining experiences include David’s Restaurant and the Second Street Lunch. All located in beautiful downtown Roanoke Rapids, NC. Check them out when you visit this fair city.

We are still getting the house we are living in set up so my cooking has been limited but I manage to fry some bacon and eggs on occasion and my normal breakfast of peanut butter, banana and soy milk has been maintained. This is probably as good a time as any to talk about just what this house is like. We live about a mile down a private road in a newly constructed house that backs up to a small pond and wilderness. The place is very peaceful and the quiet is deafening. Our back yard is filled with squirrels, rabbits and song birds. In the first two weeks of living here we have observed two turtles digging holes and burying their eggs, a flock of wild turkeys, several hawks and a large groups of my favorite birds (vultures) as well as a happy group of six baby skunks. I have only recently learned to carry a camera with me wherever I go.

Escape of the Hawk

It was several days of living here before I heard my first car and have only seen a couple of them drive by since then. The quiet is very nice but it is also a great place for serious music appreciation. No matter what volume I choose, it seems to be impossible to disturb any neighbors. Yesterday I listened to about two and a half hours of Wagner at a volume level that allowed me to truly appreciate his genius. We listen to a wide variety of styles and often fall asleep at night with some Miles Davis or John Coltrane playing. With no one to bother and only ourselves to please, life is good.

Another great feature of the silence that surrounds us is that it provides an atmosphere extremely conducive to reading and it seems like weeks since I have been able to sit down by myself and do just that for an hour or so. I’ve been filling in some of the blanks of my Shakespeare education and rereading a few of my favorite classics. It’s has been more than thirty years since I read The Scarlet Letter and I am enjoying it even more than the first time. Perhaps because I am older I am able to appreciate more of Hawthorne’s humor. Some of his passages, especially in the introduction, had me laughing out loud. Quite an image I guess, a funny old bearded man sitting in a chair in a quiet empty house all by himself laughing out loud. As I mentioned previously, life is good.

Our move from the west coast was hard. We had fun on the trip and enjoyed staying with our daughter while we got a place of our own here in Carolina, but it was stressful as well. Change is never easy and the best relationships are strained when the quarters are close. We were lucky to have family that has watched over us and helped us out. That is what family is supposed to do and we are grateful. We want to be there for any of them if they need us.

For the present we are enjoying the quiet of our new home. There have been and will be many kinks to work out and life is always made up of some percentage of struggle, but we know we are blessed or watched over or just plain lucky. Call it whatever you want, it’s all the same to me. I hope to do a lot more writing at this new location and some of it will probably end up here. Thanks for looking in from time to time and keep up the good fight. Life is Good.

P.S. Just a couple final thoughts. I know that not everyone likes to have their words or thoughts placed on public view. Many people are reluctant to leave comments as they don’t care to have the world see them. If you feel like leaving a comment but do not want it published, just say so. I will respect your requests. Of if you would like to drop me a line independently of this site, just send your emails to rkwhaley@gmail.com. I will be placing the address on my home page in the near future.

Sweet Potato Pie and Coffee

One more thing. Check out the sweet potato pie my wife bought at the local hospital and brought home for me the other day. Yum yum. Yes, it was tasty and yeah, it is gone.

1 comment | June 12th, 2009

Sit In Your Chair

All chairs are certainly not made equal.

I just spent the night in a motel in eastern North Carolina. It was actually a very nice spacious room. The motel was only about 14 months old and that makes an incredible difference in the quality of your stay. New motels have not had enough time to get stinky from smoke or disinfectant or whatever stinks up a good motel room.

One thing I personally look for in a good room is a nice chair to sit in while working at my laptop or reading or watching the TV if that is what I end up doing while I’m there. The television is rather a last resort for me unless I can find a good baseball game or a specific show I enjoy. I hate to find myself trolling with the remote. Once I start that bullshit, it can go on forever before someone comes along and slaps me on the side of the head in order to get me to snap out of it. TV is a bit like ice cream for me. I find it all too easy to start and somewhat difficult to stop. That’s why I usually sit and talk to the set when it’s on. It helps me keep the whole thing in perspective if I can point out the lies and deceptions that are going on while I watch. Unfortunately it makes me no friends with my family if they are trying to watch something while this little game is going on.

I don’t like to use the stuffed comfy chairs that are located in most hotel rooms. Most of them are way too soft for my liking and while it is easy to get into them, a person of my substantial body frame finds them rather difficult to leave. When I first eye a chair in any given new situation, whether it is a motel room or a friend’s home, I usually size up the furniture with the dismount in mind. In other words, how much effort is it going to be to get out of the damned thing?

That’s why I usually avoid soft chairs or sofas. The best bet for me is usually a straight back dining room chair or even a solid folding chair. They are easier on my back and they provide the support I crave for long spells of TV or computer time.

The chair that was pushed up against the desk in the motel room I was in made me wary from the start.

First of all, it did not look very substantial at all. It was an office type chair with wheels to roll around on (something that is usually quite pleasant for me) but there was this weird kind of pattern of holes in the back that looked faintly old-fashioned and somewhat macabre in nature. It looked almost evil. The kind of chair that invites you in when you know you should stay away and then somehow or other traps you. A black widow chair, if you will.

“Come, sit down relax…Hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!

I may let my imagination run wild sometimes but I had to sit somewhere and when I get all of my stuff in a motel room the first thing I want to do is get my laptop set up and check my email. I guess I’m just that kind of 21^st Century (check my math Randolph) kind of guy. So I sat in this suspicious chair and proceeded to boot up said computer.

If there is anywhere in this or my previous posts where I indicated that I was a really sharp, intelligent sort of person I must have been drinking when I wrote it, because it just is not so. Upon placing myself in the arms of this new chair and sitting at the desk with my laptop I was disturbed by the height of the chair. I felt like an orphan at the community table waiting for my portion of porridge. The height of the table came up to the top of my stomach just below my chest and I thought all of the blood would drain out of my arms before the afternoon was over.

I’m embarrassed to say how often a minor difficulty will cause me to adjust my actions and sometimes my thinking rather than serve as the impetus to make me fix or correct a problem. If my windshield wipers stop working I tend to do things like stick my arm out of the window in the rain and wipe away the water rather than go to a service station and get the proper repair done. I could name way too many other examples of such backward thinking but I think you get my drift.

It was only on my second trip to the computer, and therefore the chair, that I realized there was a lever on the side of it that an intelligent person could use to raise and lower the height of this sitting apparatus. Duh! OK. I can still learn things. At the proper height I came to have a new respect for this marvelous and intriguing piece of furniture.

My wife is a bit more supple and flexible, in many respects, than I am. She can use the laptop that she is normally connected too (meaning most waking hours) while sitting on the motel bed. When I felt as though I was caught up with the world of CNN, Major League Baseball, my email and twitter, I turned to her and we began to chat about our day and the things we had to do tomorrow. Lucky is the man who can talk with his wife. Not that we never disagree, but I still find her conversation truly interesting.

While I sat in the chair, I leaned back and stretched my feet out in front of me. I discovered my own personal angle of repose and laced my hands together behind my head. After a few minutes I rose to perform some task. I really don’t remember what, but the point is I got up from the chair and walked around the room. Maybe I was pulling down the covers and looking for a mint that may or may not have been placed on my pillow. (It was not there, this was not THAT good of a motel). Later when I returned to the chair I noticed that I had inadvertently rolled the arm of the chair under the handle of the drawer in the center of the table where my laptop was. When I stood up the chair rose beneath me and the arm caught on the handle and lifted the table up in the air like a jack had been placed under it. I thought that was kind of funny. This chair was still baffling me.

My experiences with this chair had already taught me many things but it was not over yet.

It was not until the next morning that I discovered another unique characteristic of this fine piece of office furniture.

Since I have a large frame, (No laughs here please), I look for more than substance or support when choosing a chair. I also have to be vigilant about the arms. In an ideal world most of the chairs I encounter would not have arms at all. After all, I am capable of resting them on a table either in front of me or to my side and if worse comes to worse I can fold them across my stomach. It’s true, I really can.

In a restaurant I usually try to be seated at a table rather than a booth but unless the chair has no arms or is fairly wide, it can be a problem sitting in it comfortably. Usually, if the chair does not fit this description, I will find myself perching on the front of it. It makes it easier to leave and I feel safer. One never knows when the place may catch fire and you will have to depart quickly.

The devil chair, or as I was beginning to feel about it, the darned good chair had arms and while that were not spaced any too far apart, they did not seem to present a real problem. But as I stated earlier, on the next day I discovered a rather cool characteristic of the chair that I had not known about earlier. The arms moved. Tadaaah!

Yes, you could push the arms and they swiveled on some sort of hinge on the back of them that caused you to be able to swing them out for more comfort. At least more comfort for us more traditionally built men. You know, the men who built this country; the real men. Oh well, be that as it may, I guess I should feel lucky that I can be entertained and educated by such a simple piece of work. Where would we be without comfortable chairs?

The Chair in Question

I remember an old episode of the Andy Griffith Show where Andy and Barney are singing this old sold that my parents sang when I was a kid. The title of the song was The Vacant Chair.

The lyrics went something like this

“We will meet, but we will miss him, there will be one vacant chair”

I looked it up on Google, you know, where we find out everything we want to know. If you’d like to read the lyrics and hear what the melody sounds like check out this link.

http://www.contemplator.com/america/vchair.html

One of my children (very funny kids have I) one time changed the words to fit the more appropriate situation in the event of my passing.

“We will meet, but we will miss him, there will be one vacant love-seat”

Funny children I raised. Yes, I am a lucky guy.

Add comment | May 22nd, 2009

Great Pig at Ralph’s Barbeque

Ralph's Barbeque

I live in North Carolina now. Some of you who know me are aware of the fact that I prefer living on the west coast. It’s not that I don’t like North Carolina or the east coast it’s just that given my druthers, I would prefer to live on the west coast. It’s a totally different vibe there. People are more casual in dress and manner and that is a big part of Bob.

The truth is that there are good and bad things about every place. There are good and bad things about almost everything in life and I think one of the big things that separates sane people from the majority of us is the ability to discern those differences and not let them drive you nuts. Life is full of good and bad things and you have to learn to deal with it or lose your mind.

One of the truly great things about North Carolina is the barbeque. You know I love that eastern style pulled or chopped pork. I’ve raved about it here, many a time.

My First Helping

As I write this I am sitting in a Starbucks in Roanoke Rapids, NC with a full belly and a happy heart. My wife and I are visiting this fair city today. Roanoke Rapids is about half way between Raleigh, NC and Richmond, VA, right next to Interstate 95. On the other side of I-95 is the small community of Weldon, NC and that is the home of Ralph’s Barbeque. I just had the luncheon buffet and I could not be more pleased with my meal. I have had barbeque in many places and cooked in many styles but today was my first buffet. I am very pleased.

I'll have just a little bit more, please.

Let’s talk about what they had on this all-you-can-eat, $7.99 including drink, barbeque lunch buffet.

First of all, they had the eastern style vinegar based pork I love both chopped and pulled. They also had the tomato based sweet sauce pork as well, but I avoided it. It may be fine for some people (like my wife) but it is really not for me.

Pigs relaxing before the barbeque

A virtual cornucopia of side dishes was included in the lunch. They had sweet potatoes, succotash, macaroni and cheese, beef stew with potatoes, cooked cabbage, collard greens, stewed tomatoes, barbecued chicken and much more.

One good old southern side they had was green beans. Now you may have eaten green beans in many different styles during your life but they have a very special way of cooking them in the south. In the south they like to cook them to death. I enjoy green beans when they are just a little under done with a touch of crispness to them but in the south most people prefer that they just plain melt in your mouth and cooking them to death achieves this goal. I once heard a fine southern gentleman state that you should not have to chew green beans if they are cooked properly. They should be like eating gravy. They should just melt in your mouth. These were true southern style cooked green beans and they were delicious.

They had other beans on the buffet as well and if you are a regular reader you are aware of my feelings about side dishes and beans in general. I am a bit particular about my beans.

Recently I had occasion to make a crock pot of my own beans and I was quite proud of them. My recipe is really very simple. I buy several cans of a variety of beans including navy beans, pintos, black-eyed peas, kidney beans and whatever else I see and think would taste good. I drain them and add them all to a crock pot. Then I fry up some chopped bacon with a couple of cloves of garlic and a chopped onion. All of this goes into the pot with a can of drained, diced tomatoes and some salt and pepper. Cook them on high for 5 or 6 hours and they are about ready to eat.

The beans at Ralph’s were not done the way I make them but I have no complaints. I really liked them very much. They were a simple cooked bean dish of just white beans. I don’t know for sure what kind of beans they were but they looked like small navy beans and they tasted wonderful.

Everything was outstanding. The pulled pork was perfect, the collards were outstanding and when I had only the smallest amount of space left in my gut I got some banana pudding. Exquisite. I am back in the south and there are wonderful reasons to be happy about that.

The Great Waitresses of Ralph's Barbeque

There is one more thing I need to mention about this dining experience. The waitresses were extremely helpful and polite. I love to see a waitress smile and they had great smiles and courteous attitudes. Hospitality can often carry a restaurant but at Ralph’ it is just the icing on the cake. If you are traveling I-95 you should make it a point of stopping at exit 173 for lunch or dinner. This is what eastern North Carolina is all about.

Look for this sign and smile.

In closing let me say that there is only one thing I regret about the whole experience. I wish I could have seen the place at night. There are little neon, pig shaped lights that run across the top of the building and on the big sign out by the road and I bet they look great lit up after dark. As I stated earlier, you just have to learn to take the bad with the good. Being there in the daytime meant that the only things that were lit up were my eyes and my stomach.

Yum Yum.

Good Pig.

1 comment | May 14th, 2009